CRANKY!
Originally Posted: 7/10/2002

STAND BACK EVERYONE! I AM CRANKY! Oh yes, it’s true, there’s nothing good to be said right now. All is wrong. My cat meows too much and he doesn’t know how to make poops outside. My girlfriend wakes up too early and makes way to much noise doing frivolous things around the house such as showering and dressing. I am hungry but nothing sounds good. The front door sticks when it’s humid. I left my gym socks at home. I am having technical difficulties one of my email accounts. I am bored at work this week. I have more than 70 bug bites from this weekend. Operation: Learning Things is going frighteningly slowly. I don’t have the body of Serena OR Venus Williams. My breasts are freakishly small. Neither of my notebooks are a good size for writing jokes. I don’t understand why http://www.openletters.net doesn’t start up again. I spent 4 hours explaining to Martha how to become a bon vivant only for her to decide she’d rather be an ingénue. It’s too hot in my room with the fan off but I hate waking up with the fan blowing in my face. And don’t even get me started on the world as it exists in the newspapers. Mostly because I have lost the ability to retain information after I’ve read it and so I’ve forgotten what I thought about current events. Do you see what I’m getting at here? Do you see?